The Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #13: It Takes Time

A new issue of the The Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter

The problem with regular therapy is that therapists don't know shit. For example, a person with severe social anxiety comes to them, and they go: "Oh, I'm sure there are some social groups or activities that you could join. You just need to go there, and if you do that, you will overcome your social isolation".
Or: "You got crippling anxiety and panic attacks? Gradually expose yourself to situations that cause anxiety, and it will go away".
As if it ever were that easy!

The thing is... mental health trouble is heavy stuff. It's not easy. It's hard to deal with. Most of the time, it doesn't just go away. And it cannot be overcome by sheer will power or focusing on "positive thinking".
People who are "mentally ill" (I dislike that term, though) usually have good reasons why they are in this state, why they stay in this state, and why they *want* to stay in that state.

For example, a person who lives in social isolation might have gone through extreme childhood bullying. Exposed to such horror, it's easy to create a belief system where every human being is against you.
And if that were the case, it *would be* rational to just hide in your home, away from the rest of humanity, forever.

Or you got panic attacks. And every time you try a certain thing, the panic takes hold. And you seemingly cannot do anything about this.
If that's the case, it *would be* rational to 'cave in' and to just avoid doing the thing you wanted to do - forever.

In the end, these are all illusions. Because there are always true alternatives, and ways to truly solve the problem.
But the person with these problems might not see it this way, and within their "worldview", these decisions of avoidance, "giving up", giving in to isolation and fear and decline, might actually be a very rational choice (mind you, just *within* this faulty view of things - not truly rational in the wider world).
And the therapists then fail to realize why the troubled folk cling to these half-true, half-fake rationalities...

So, in the end, there are a lot of illusions, there is a lot of deceit, a lot of deluding yourself in the most negative way while honestly believing you would make a positive decision by staying in your world of mental illness.

And all of this is hard work and not easy to overcome.

So, I think it's important to realize - it takes time.
Mental problems don't just go away overnight (or by *willing them away*, like the therapists seem to believe).
Try to do a few steps, maybe even the smallest of steps, that could improve your situation.
You might really be in a situation where trying to tackle and handle *everything at once* is just too much (Btw: I'm merely saying *it might be*... it could be different for you, I'm not your therapist and won't give you direct advice).
And if you took a few steps, it might actually happen that you slide down the ladder again and feel like everything was in waste and you hit rock bottom once more...
But that's not the case, take a break, and then walk on and try a few more minor steps...

It's a tough and long task to untangle all of this. So be forgiving and patient with yourself and your mental process.

There is a good, healthy, positive way out.
But it may take some time to travel this way.

You can read other issues of the Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter here:
https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Shouting Hardcore Part 2 - Scream it out for the Tingler

In my music and cultural research, I just stumbled upon this little info.
It was found embedded within a plot summary about the movie "The Tingler" featuring Vincent Price.

'He discovers that there is a creature living in the spine of every human being that feeds on the fear of its host. If the host does not start screaming in a state of fear, the creature, known as the "Tingler", grows to full life size, which leads to the death of the human.'

I don't know the movie, probably some kinda kitschi-scari 50s affair.
But all irony aside.
I think there's some truth in the above statement.
If you chuck up all your emotions and swallow them, well that's not healthy at all. Even "dark" emotions like fear or panic...
So scream it out my friend!
Scream it out, until The Tingler itself gets scared and runs away, back to its own hellish dimension!

And what better way to scream out all your anger, pain, agony, fear, anxiety - than some good ol' hardcore techno and gabber house?

So here is a list of 10 more screaming hardcore tracks.

These tracks are about literal screams - i.e. not just loud vocalizing, but actual, deep, fried, human (or non-human) SCREAMS! 

1. Napalm - Scream



2. Bakalla - True Force



3. Scarface - Blow Your Head Off



4. Sauerkraut - I Don't Believe In You



5. Marc Acardipane The Horrorist - Metal Man



6. U.V.C. DJ Narotic - Industrial Strength



7. DJ Tron - F*ck That Happy Shit



8. Napalm - Shit01



9. The Horrorist - Can You Hear the Sound?



10. Ec8or - Raving Hypospadie



11. DJ Jappo DJ Lancinhouse - F*kem Outro



Also check our earlier feature: "Hardcore Techno Anger Management - Release your rage in a social way"
https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/2024/10/hardcore-techno-anger-management.html

The Movie "Fire Walk With Me" and the Intrinsic Message of Hardcore Techno

[in connection with The Mental Hardcore Health newsletter https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html ]

Angelo Badalamenti - Laura Palmer's Theme (Instrumental)

For some, "Hardcore Techno" is just a genre of music. For others, deeper messages can be found woven in between the tracks, the soundwaves, the soundscapes...

I want to talk about one of the message that I perceive within Hardcore; and for me it's its main message.
But it's also quite hard to describe, with mere words, on a rational level... maybe it's something that is better to be 'felt'... thus I will try to describe it using an example from another type of media.

There's a scene towards the end of the movie "Fire Walk With Me"
It's one of the best known movies by director David Lynch; he is known to incorporate the surreal and subconsciousness in his works at one level, but also an onslaught of visuals that feel traumatic, nightmarish, that emit pure terror and nothingness.

Cybernators - No Out of Here 

Viewing his media has often been called "mentally healing", stitching subconscious wounds, relieving traumas, by those who suffer from severe mental problems / and "disorders".
This form of "traumatic healing" through dark media could link David Lynch's works to similar effects that can be found within Hardcore Techno music [ https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/2024/05/from-moments-of-terror-to-states-of.html ].


At the same time, I think there even could be thrown a lot of criticism at Lynch's media from a feminist or progressive point of view. But I don't want to address this here; this text is just about this scene in this one movie.

Given the darkness and borderline nihilism that is ubiquitous in his works, there is one scene in fire walk with me that particular sticks out for a lot of people who adore his output.

RMB - Redemption

(Major spoilers ahead, so be warned!). (also trigger warning ahead)

A young woman is tied up in an abandoned train car somewhere deep in the forest, and is about to be killed by a possessed serial killer.
There are a few minutes that are almost too terrible to watch, and amidst this terror, she starts to pray.
because of this, suddenly an angel appears, loosens her bonds, and she is able to free herself and is - saved.

for fans of david lynch, this scene feels particularly "strange"; almost too kitsch-y, banal, like in a feel-good kind of movie.
"oh, you ran into trouble? just pray, and everything is solved!"
which clashes with the content of lynch's art. and i do not think he is a devout Christian or anything like that, at least it does not come across in the movies.

Terror Arnold - Dead (Fuck You)

this scene confused me, too. until i read an interesting feature in "Wrapped in Plastic", a fanzine dedicated to deeply scrutinizing and exploring all of lynch's movies, going farther than most, almost analyzing a movie sentence by sentence.

the feature tied this perplexing scene to an earlier scene.

a few days before her death, the main protagonist Laura Palmer passes the "log lady", a woman that comes across as a somewhat "confused medium" in the Lynchverse.

Laura Palmer, at this point, has been on a spree of self-destruction, drug abuse, and had descended into some quite shady circles. (and this is still an understatement)

Society of Unknowns - Dead by Dawn (The Endless Mix)

The log lady gives Laura Palmer a monologue, referring to the errors of her ways, and the terrible ending that was already in sight for her.

Viewers have often seen this monologue as a "premonition" of Laura Palmer's death, delivered by the "psychic powers" of the above mentioned lady.

And indeed, Laura's life was completely derailed at this point, she seemed to have been stuck with no way out, no way to escape.

was this monologue the log lady's farewell to Laura?
 

Angelo Badalamenti - Audrey's Dance

"wrapped in plastic" delivered another interpretation and explanation.
it pointed out that sentences like "when this kind of fire starts, it is very hard to put out" does not mean *it could not be put out*. it just means it would be very hard to put out. (if you know the movie, her reference to a rising "fire" makes more sense).
but Laura palmer could have done it, if she had decided to do so. (this also goes against a popular fan theory that Laura palmer was "destined to be murdered" from the very start).

the magazine links this to the later scene with the woman that was saved by - a "prayer".
this should be seen as a metaphor. you should not literally pray to the christian god when you are in trouble.
almost all of the content in lynch's movie has a symbolic aspect, too.
and it could be interpreted in this way.


even at "death's door", you are not lost.
even if you are irredeemable lost, you are not *truly* lost.
even if you are in a life situation where you are stuck and there is no way out left. you are not *truly* lost.
no matter what you have done. no matter what part of it was "your own fault". no matter if it was morally wrong.
you are not lost.

no matter if it seems realistically, or even physically impossible to get out. you are not lost.

no matter how bad it is.
no matter how much pain.
no matter how out-of-control you are.
you are not lost.

there is *always* a way out. there is always an escape. there is always a solution.
it's never "just walls without exit".
there is always an exit. there is always a passage. there is always a way out.

you are just not seeing this exit. you just "imagine" that you are irrefutably stuck. but that's just an illusion.
you are not stuck - so, move out! on your own free will.

Deadly Buda - Crossroads

if we interpretate the movie scene in this way, this could even explain the strange "invasion" of Christian mythology in this moment.
maybe even within the metaphor of the movie it's not about religion and prayer at all.
maybe she just felt extremely terrified and in pain and remembered a prayer from her childhood and decided to recite.

maybe this tiny gesture, this tiny action, expressing "I'm in pain and I do not want to be in this situation", this "tiny" call for help, was enough to resolve the situation for her?

Of course, this is, once again, within the metaphor of the movie setting.

But maybe there is tiny gesture, a small amount of action you could do, that expresses that you want to be saved, or that you direly need help?
and maybe this could save you, too?

try it! what do you have to lose, anyway?

The Kotzaak Klan - Locked Inside

so let us tie this to the context of hardcore techno again.
this is the idea, this is the message i get from hardcore.

the people who listened to (and produced!) hardcore techno in the 90s were truly "lost", too.
people from the fringes of society. teenagers stuck in domestic violence. drug addicts "beyond recovery". small time criminals slowly leveling up to a life in prison. severely mentally "ill" folk. homeless teens, teens on the run. and much more. and people with even worse problems.

but this music gave a lot of these the idea that maybe - "not everything is lost at all".
the idea that, even if your life is 100% hell and unbearable in this very second - you are still a valuable person, *your life has meaning*, there are still moments of "fun" that you can experience (for example by partying to hardcore) and that maybe, just maybe, there is still a way out of all this...

i don't know how the music managed to achieve this - but it did.
"hardcore techno" was this tiny gesture, or big kick in the butt, that a lot us needed - to get out of this crap, and escape all of this.
Even if only partly in some cases - if you made it halfway, why shouldn't you it all the way, too?

and i don't think this has changed much in today's hardcore techno community.

Raver's Nature - Signal Of Moving

this is the "message" of hardcore techno for me - for a lot of other people, too.

other music genres express this idea, too, it's in movie like the abovementioned fire walk with me.
So it must be true!


You can always find a way out.

Angelo Badalamenti - The Fireman

Hardcore Emotions: Fear

Another issue in our series on emotions and how they are used as tropes in hardcore music.

Sentiments, moods and sensation that are often considered "taboo" within mainstream society are very prominent and visible within the hardcore scene.

Amongst other "moods" such as anger and lust, one of these is fear - in all its varieties.
Anxiety, nightmares, terror, panic, mortal fright... all these are expressed and can be felt within hardcore tracks.

This is further enhanced by the wide-spread use of samples taken from "scary" horror, sci-fi, war, or noir movies (hellraiser, taxi driver, full metal jacket...).
So the hardened, head-strong gabber community seemingly is a frightful lot - at least partly.

But, as always, let us be aware that the healthy expression of such "sickened" emotions can be quite healing and beneficial.

And now, let's turn to some hardcore tracks that are related to "fear" in intent, track title, feel of the composition, or other and similar ways.

1. The Mover - Invite The Fear

2. Dr. Macabre - Alone in the Dark

https://www.toolboxrecords.com/fr/product/10100/hardcore/haunted-house-03/

3. Scaremonger - Soon We All Will Have Special Names

4. Cyanide - Edge Of Panic

5. C-Tank - Nightmares are Reality

6. DJ Dano - Terror is Timeless

7. DJ Waxweazle - Brainscan

8. Scarface - Shock Intro

9. The Dark Raver & Gizmo - Direction of Fear II

10. Jack Lucifer - 95 knights (Don't Fear The Darkness)

Tropes of Madness and Insanity within Hardcore Techno music

we alluded to mental health topics in the past.

and indeed, "mental illness", insanity, psychological derangement is one of the major recurring themes within hardcore music - and the hardcore community.

the relationship between art and, let's say, "mental conditions", has been documented for a long time in human history, and it is often concluded that this combination can be quite beneficial and healing - to everyone involved.

hardcore techno occupies a special location here, though:

this is not about sitting down and drinking herbal tea or doing yoga, while listen to relaxing "eastern-sounding" ambient recordings and an european-born "guru" telling you to chill the *** down with sour-sweet words.

these artists and tracks give mental health the hardcore treatment. it's an exacerbation of the highest degree and definitely should not be taken at face value, literally, or too "serious" (humor is a great form of therapy, too!).

it's like being shown a very distorted mirror (and the volume levels in these tracks are very distorted too, as i can assure you).

because many people who listen to gabber house tracks about some wicked psychopaths will probably think "hey, my own mental issues, like anxiety at the supermarket or being depressed about my body image, seem quite little compared to the issues *these* folk have".

and this can already be quite relieving to know.

so this stuff should not be taken too serious, this music should not be seen as encouraging or promoting wickedness.

there is a lot of humor involved - a healing form of humor - but yeah, mental health *is* a heavy and serious topic, so take these things with caution.

let's give a trigger warning. this is some *deep* stuff ahead that might feel traumatic or scary to some people.

go on at your own will, at your own cost, and treat this thing with care and in a responsible way.

So let's look at some example tracks now:

1. Critical Mass - Psychotic Break (Lenny Dee & Strychnine Remix) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tc_u-nIw3XA "...having a serious psychotic break"
2. Delta 9 - Phreaked - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvEw7T9-iDY "I'm freaking out man... I need medication..."
3. Asylum - Mescalum https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZbmhWRXXHU One of the earliest Hardcore tracks... and it's already about an asylum.
4. Turbulence - The Home Of The Sick https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOukQpTKU2E A home for the sick could be a hospital... or a mental hospital.
5. Collective Strength - Family Affair https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wv6Vn7nUkGA Highly disturbing!
6. Disciples Annihilation - You're Dead https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDDqd9i4oEo evokes sentiments of the overlook hotel...
7. Violent Agression - Shizoid Fukd Soul - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYhRwvNsxn0 german language, sorry... but... "i am not insane! you must listen to me before it's too late!"
8. Mescalinum United - Light Bringer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItEQBcOzr84 "the first sign of psychosis is a christ complex"
9. FFM Shadow Orchestra - Killing Zoo (Cleaner Edit) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFxC8KLbi6I "you feel as though the rest of the world is in a bubble of glass and that you're rubbing up against it like a bad windshield wiper."
10. Ralphie Dee - Mad As Hell https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeY3OWLdEH0 "this is mass madness, you maniacs!"
11. The Kotzaak Klan - Sikk! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cX0ltdbPSQ "a sick man... mentally sick".

Further Examples:

• Mind Candy - Mind Destroyer
• The Berzerker - Forever
• Terrorists - Paranoia
• Dr. Macabre - Alone In The Dark
• Noisegate - Goddamn' Mind
• Ectomorph - Blow Your Mind
• Noface - Hallucinate
• Random Rampage - Psycho
• DJ Promo - Psychostyle

Read more about Hardcore Techno and Mental Health here: https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Mental Hardcore Health News Letter #12 - The Hardcore Techno Mental Health Connection (and Hardcore as a type of therapy)

The reactions to our Mental Hardcore Health News were very good so far - much better than we expected, to be honest!
A few people went "yikes!" of course, probably feeling uncomfortable when "mental heatlh topics" are mentioned - and some went "well, what has this to do with hardcore techno and gabber?"
A lot! There is a quite deep connection between these two subjects. Let's take a look at that.

Some people listen to music "for fun", to feel good, euphoric; to be entertained, or to dance, or to be social, maybe even to flirt with others at a party...
But music can also have a therapeutic and healing effect.

And, 99 out of 100 people that I met and who are into hardcore and gabber, told me that this was the main reason they listen to this very extreme and surreal genre of music.
Well, they might not exactly word it that way - I, too, think terms like "therapeutic" and "mental health" can sound a bit sterile and clinical - but they employed words to the same effect.

They said that they turn to Hardcore when feeling blue, down, "being through with the world", weary, hopeless; or, 'to the opposite', when being full of pent-up rage, fury, anger, frustration; when being haunted by visions of vengeance and retaliation; and powerful sounds of hardcore would help them through this conundrum.

or they feel lost in a world that seems hostile, mean, merciless; a society and culture that neither cares, nurtures and supports them; but the beats of hardcore give them a feeling of individuality, rebellion, and self-esteem.

or they appear disconnected and dis-enchanted from the "mainstream" world, its misery, wars, negative politics, tragedies; and hardcore offers a voice to these voiceless, which allows them to feel understood and "not alone" for once.

I could tell 1000 more examples like this. but i guess you get the gist by now.

In one way or another, people in this "scene" feel troubled or are encountering troubles in their lives; and hardcore techno is their choice healing force, medicine, elixir that mitigates this pain.

and there are even a lot of folk who bear witness to the fact that hardcore music had the power and strength to help them "get through" when they met the darkest moments of their own life, whichever these might have been.

thus, hardcore is indeed deeply entwined in mental health subjects of all kinds.

and hardcore folk are bit different to other people in the respect that they do not merely listen to their favorite music to feel good; but because they know these sounds are strong enough to save their very souls.

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #11 - Hardcore Techno as a community of rejects

[A personal account]

Today I want to talk about what Hardcore Techno means to me, from the bottom of my heart. Not just the music - the movement, the scene, everything.

Part 1 - The world we live in

So, let's begin. The thing is, in our oh-so civilized world, there is a certain impression that is spread around. Which is that we would live in a society that cares about the well-being of its members. That 'basic humans needs' are taken care of. Unlike that "bad, evil" world "outside the west", where people could die of starvation, or civil war rages, or they rot in prisons.

And this is just not true. Maybe it's true for the majority of people. Maybe it's true for some people. Maybe it's even true for no-one. But I know one thing. For a lot of people, in "well-civilized" Europe, Northern America, Australia, elsewhere, "life" is a daily fight for survival. They don't know if they are still alive next week. They don't know how to get by. They stared into the abyss all their life. And no-one takes care of them. No-one even cares. And that's how society is. That's the world we live in.

And, most harrowingly, this is highly effecting children and childhood in general.
Kids might be subjected to bullying in schools; and i don't mean taunting or name-calling, I mean being confronted with bullies that have knifes, guns, or other weapons and that might snuff them out within a few seconds. having to face them each day at school, and not knowing if they are still alive in the evening.
Or they have physically abusive parents, drug, alcohol addicts, a father (or mother) that might bludgeon them to death in an angry fit one day.
They might have teachers that harm them. They might be in institutions and facilities that are a danger to them. They might be homeless.

There are countless other examples of very bad situations that you can find yourself in when you are young.
And in these cases, *no one* will come to help you or rescue you. Society does not care. You are on your own - and you are left for dead.

Yes, maybe, someone somewhere got helped by "understanding adults", just like in these cheesy silly movies.
But the reality in most cases is that society spits on you and hopes that you die and fade away quickly.

Part 2 - The underground family

And this is where Hardcore Techno came in; not just Hardcore Techno, of course.
These "dead end kids" eventually formed youth cultures; rock'n'roll in the 50s, rock in the 60s, rap, punk, metal, mods, northern soul... and then Hardcore and Gabber, too. These youth sub-cultures led to communities of rejects. If no one else cares.... at least *we* do care about our own kind, right?

One of the most marvelous things about being in the HC scene was meeting other people who went through the same shit - or even worse stuff - as me, connected by the common interest in this very unique form of music, and then trying to help and support each other.
Even simply knowing that you are not the only one who was treated like a stain of excrement by everyone else in life can already be a quite helpful event.

That's the spirit of Hardcore for me, and the feelings and experiences of violence, trauma, rage, hatred, rejection, can be heard in the vocals and lyrics of the original Gabber tracks and the sentiments of their sounds.

Part 3 - Hope for the future

i hope that the new generation that enters the hardcore movement in the future will gain the same beneficial reactions - and that all of us will still be bound by a sense of unity.

and maybe, maybe, some time in the future, even the people of the "civilized western world" will start to care for other humans, too, instead of putting innocent lives in danger.

For other editions of the Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter, check here:
https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #10 - Dealing With Social Isolation

Welcome to a new edition of the Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter.

Dealing with social isolation

One of the most common issues related to "mental health" within the Hardcore Techno scene is social isolation.

This goes from "living a somewhat functional life without friends and acquaintances" (this is already bad enough) to total isolation: having severe social anxiety, not being able to leave the house / flat, and literally not seeing or talking to a human soul for ages (and this is even much worse).

Another aspect is being "isolated in crowds". A person might have "friends", people they know at work, family members, might even attend big parties and events - yet experience an overwhelming feeling of alienation, of not being connected to others.
The feeling that others do not really relate to, or understand, your own thoughts, feelings, aspirations.
Even though you might have "friends", you are not "really" able to talk to them about the things you really need - on the inside, you keep being the "odd one out".

Or someone is well-connected and has many contacts online, on the internet, but zero friends in the real world.

This does not only effect fans and supporters of the Hardcore Techno movement, but often even its prime movers and shakers.
Well-known DJs, producer, promoters...

Why do you think so many famous artists "disappeared" from the scene?
A lot of them went into "hiding", moved to a more remote place, and are living like social hermits now... and that's really sad.

But this already indicates that there should be *no shame* to it. It can happen to everyone. Even to successful, creative, highly-admired people...
It's not your fault if you have no friends.

And if you want to heal and get out of this situation, this is probably the first and best thing you can do:
Realize that *you are not alone in your isolation".
That's quite paradox. But social isolation, even in its most severe variants, is a very common thing these days that is troubling millions of people.


What else can you do to overcome this situation?

2. Open up about it! Talk to others, and talk about it, online, or in real life.
In my experience, the response can be more positive and helpful than you would have expected.

3. Don't suffer in silence.
Beyond talking about isolation, express your emotions, even the most negative ones.

Trying to hide and swallow sadness, melancholy, anxiety, and depression is always a bad idea. You can verbally communicate them, or put them into art, poetry, activity...
And things related to Hardcore Techno music can be especially "therapeutic" here...

4. Don't blame yourself
It is, in all likeliness, not your fault if you have no friends.
We live in a very superficial and shallow society, where social ties get severed more and more.
Minds are set to money and media, and if you desire more meaningful inclinations - you get pushed away and kicked out.
But even beyond "contemporary capitalism" - if you are a unique, wonderful, one of a kind human being, it will always be difficult to connect to a crowd.

5. Enough is enough

Social isolation is amongst the worst form of torture. It can cause other types of mental trouble, and really drive you off the rails.
You need the social contacts. So it's important that you take action and honestly make the decision to change this fate.
Get out of your cage - or go insane.

6. Go into crowds

Well, I mentioned that it can be difficult and painful to connect to others. Still, there might be local groups, activities, events, you can go to.
This is a bit of a two sided thing. You might go there, not being able to connect, and feel like a freak again.
Or it could be nicer than you think.

7. Get off the internet

That should be a given, right? Being online all day and sitting in front of your devices is one of the major causes of real-world isolation.
Switch things off more often, and go outside.

8.
And beyond that...?
The above is all just a start.
More things definitely need to be done.
Trying to overcome isolation can be a really difficult, complicated, strainful task. It's hard and painful work.

As there are powerful social, cultural, and political causes of isolation, it might indeed be the case that this can only be truly overcome by social, cultural, and political activism and campaigns.


One thing should be clear: the problem of isolation can only be solved on a collective level.

But, in any way. You need to action, and you need to keep going.

You can access other issues of the Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter here:

https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #9: Leaving Social Media - A Personal Experience

Welcome to a new edition of the Mental Hardcore Health newsletter.
We want to share the following real-world-story with you:

How I left social media as a successful artist (and nearly snapped my mind on the way out)

Hello,
I'm a Hardcore Techno producer and author for a few decades now.
I didn't want to, but I became overly addicted to social media over the last years, and it took a huge toll on my mental health (which was not so good to begin with anyway - and that's a huge understatement).
I was especially heavy on the use of Facebook and Instagram - constantly posting stuff, trying to chat with people there, and to "promote" my music, or talk about politics - well, you probably know that crap.

So, I made the decision - I need to get out, and leave all of that behind.
I tried to leave before, but often had a relapse, and went back to the heavy use of social media again.

Because of that, this time I tried to make a plan.
I 'analyzed' there were a few reasons why I could not break free from social media.
There were minor things such as: social media provides easy distractions, a feed of seemingly interesting stuff, and so on.

But also a very major thing: I had close to zero social contacts, or even social life, in the real world. Almost all my "friends" and acquaintances were on social media, and especially on FB and "Insta". These were mostly other DJs, producers, promoters, and so on.
I deduced that this was a *real* problem. It was not something imaginary, a problem that I "made up in my head"; without social media I would slip into social isolation. And this would pummel my mental health again (which was not so good to begin with, as I said before). Because lack of social contacts can mess up a lot of people; me being no different to that.

Therefore my plan was this: I would tell my friendly DJs and artists and everyone else, that I would leave, and tell them how they could contact me in other ways (I guess you know already know how this will end).
For example by E-Mail, or WhatsApp, or other non-social media ways.

They told me they would keep in touch this way, and they did.
It was all sunshine then, I was off social media, my mental state improved, I had more time and clarity and focus and energy to focus on producing music and writing my e-books.
And talking to my friends on E-mail or on a non-media messenger felt better, the convos were more in-depth and personal than "leaving a comment" on insta.

And then the thing happened which I should have expected in the first place:
My friends stopped talking to me, one after another. In a few weeks, after a few months off social media, the communication completely dried up.
I'm not entirely sure why, but I should have expected it.
I messaged some of them, in the way of "hey, what's up, how are you doing" etc., or talking about projects and music releases, and I got some "friendly" replies and they said they would get back to me and of course they never did.

So yeah, I felt like I was thrown into a social vacuum, and this took a huge toll on me.
My mental state was worsening rapidly, as I literally had no-one to talk to, no-one to exchange ideas, music, thoughts with, I felt like my mind was locked up in a solitary cell and someone had thrown away my key.

I realized I needed to act or I would go batshit insane.

As my oh-so-clever plan to be able to stay "social" on the internet without social media failed, I saw there was only one route left. I needed to go into the offline world, instead of the online world.

I didn't expect anything exciting to happen on a social level in my urban surroundings, but I knew I needed to get out either way.

So I checked the internet for all kinds of stuff that was happening in the vicinity, concerts, festivals, art exhibits. I took up sports and bicycling and spend hours (and kilometers) pedaling around, in the nearby forests, to the nearby lakes, out into nature.

While I did not really make friends this way, going into the real world felt much better than I expected.
And I was surprised how friendly and nice the people that I met were, on average. A thousands times more friendly than the "online folk"!

But this was of course no replacement for "real" connections with other humans. And I was still an artist who was used to network and collaborate with other people on projects in order to "get shit done"...
And I was not getting ahead there.
I eventually deduced that the reason my social media friends discarded me was, well, because they were on social media. And I was not. They were in that social media world, and I was an "alien" to that now.

So the thought came to me to reach out to people who were not on social media too, or who I at least shared a connection with outside of it.
Including people that I did not contact for years after I got sucked into that whole social media thing (what goes around comes around, right?).

So I sent out a lot of e-mails and messages, and not everyone replied, but it was good to be in touch with some great old friends again.

Then everything went step by step. The crisis became a thing of the past, I'm part of a community of people again, I'm doing more music and projects than ever, I made lots of new acquaintances, labels, scouts, organizations reach out to me, things are nice and bright now. (I don't say that as an "ego-boost", I just want to be honest to show that life as an artist is indeed more saccharine without artificial social media sweeteners).

I guess just like with quitting other heavy addictions, I needed to full into this "black hole" and misery, before things could become better.

Going on with honesty, I'm not "totally social media" free right now.
I still use:

YouTube (a lot)
Reddit (but I curb it a lot)
Discord (same)

Ideally I would be free of all of these, but I was able to stop 95% of my daily social media activities, and I'm planning to stop the remaining 5% too, one day.
That's actually another main advice I would give to people who have a very hard time quitting social media: do it continuously, but do it in slices, and not all at once.

Now, who knows, maybe I can't keep it up, and will relapse again, or something like that, in the future.
But I feel that I was able to reach the point I am at - right here, right now, is a powerful success for me.
And again I don't want to ego-boost myself by saying this: because the message I want to put across is that *you could do it to* and succeed at it!

Mental Hardcore Newsletter #8: *You* decide how you want to live your life

A new edition of the Mental Hardcore Newsletter.

As fans, enthusiasts, artists, who are into darker and more disturbing forms of music, or as being interested in deeper topics like philosophy, psychology, counterculture, surrealism, and so on, there is always the tendency to burrow yourself and live an isolated life, away from most human interaction.
And, all that life, people told us we should stop this, get away from it, and "join society" and "live normal lives" like everyone else. But we did not do that.

Now as we get "older", or rather as we enter the present times, this social isolation and everything that comes with it can become quite unbearable.
So there is the tendency to finally "give in", and trying to do what we have been told earlier: "re-join" normal society.
Maybe life would be easier to bear then?

But things are even more complicated nowadays: Normal society is falling apart and will soon be no more.
So any thought or plan about "going the normal route", get a normal job, buy a house, build a family, do "normal" things etc, maybe planning a vacation or going to or a conventional discotheque have become complete nonsense.
As the big, big "system" that is supporting all these "normal activities" is disintegrating and crumbling to dust.

So, both options - staying isolated or mingling with "normal society" - are doomed to fail.
What to do now? I don't know.

But my idea would be: going out in the world again, but as an active agent of change, someone who spreads cultural liberation, and not someone who *adapts* or *conforms* to other people, not as someone who is obedient and tries to fit in. Come as a conqueror, not as a slave.

Connect with your own tribe - not with the drones who march by the beat of authority.

Yours is the choice, but choose wisely.

For previous issues, go to: https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #7 - Performance Anxiety

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #7 - Performance Anxiety

Lately, more DJs and producers have begun to open up about their mental health struggles or issues - such as anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder and so on, and to talk about them.

The response has been varied, but most of the time positive, and much better than I expected.

This is a huge step towards making mental health problems less of a taboo; in the hardcore scene, in the techno, and in society as a whole.

Yet there is still another, related taboo; a topic that is still kept secret, hidden, invisible, most of the time.

Because when mental health issues of artists and musicians become known, this is often seen as a split, 'two part' type of thing. As if there were, on the one side, the artist, his music, his performances - his idolized, desired life - and on the other side the 'problem', the trouble, that is somewhat detached from the 'artist' life of the musician.

Like a famous movie director who opens about a cancer diagnosis; there is the beloved life of the director and his movies; and the illness is somewhat in the way of him pursuing his creativity, of creating further movies; and people wish him well, so that he gets cured and can pick up making great films again.

but what is there is not "art", "music", "performance", "activity" on the one side, and the "mental health issue" on the other side?

What is if the activity is deeply entwined in the problem, connected, interlinked? not something you could split off and get away with so easily?

What I'm talking about is DJs, artists, producers having severe mental issues when trying to follow their creativity and / or performing their art.

such as anxiety and panic attacks in relation to DJing in front of a crowd at a club; or panic and fright that even prevents them from entering a club and location at all.

depression and social disorders that prevent them from meeting other artists or other people involved in this music scene.

"social anxiety" does not stop once you enter the internet; there might be artists who have problems dealing with people online as well, and simply being "too scared" to upload and share there music on the internet, on video sites, etc.

to be more exact, there are people who literally go through hell when being booked at a party; with traveling to their destination, checking in at their hotel / place to sleep, arriving at the club, and finally, performing, each being its own unbearable infernal torment for them.

this can be a huge problem; not only on a "personal", mental level, when having to live through such amounts of pain, fear, or sadness; but it can also fuck up your trajectory as an artist for good; because whether you are a producer or DJ, performing in the real world, at clubs, is a huge part of being active in the music scene, and if you can't do that because you feel too frightened, well, yeah, that's a real shit situation then.

or if you are too scared to share your music online because of your social fears... well, this really sucks then, too!

I've mostly mentioned anxiety related "disorders" here; but this of course goes for such things as depression and other problems as well; if you can't produce new music because you are heavily depressed, or even delete your music collection because you are so severely haunted by dark thoughts, then this is a big problem, too.

I said that this matter is still a taboo; I rarely heard of active musicians opening up about the panic or despair they feel when performing yet - and all the related things to that. And this is quite understandably so.

In a former newsletter, I mentioned that one of the problems of being "hardcore and mentally ill" is that there is still this trope of being macho, strong, tenacious, 'hardcore' in this scene; and you don't feel very hardcore when you want to run away crying and screaming while spinning tracks at a club.

One of the reason people don't talk about problems such as this is that they feel that they might be considered wimps, cowards, and weaklings in the scene then; this is generally true for opening about issues, but as mentioned in the beginning of the text, if you just speak about having anxiety or depression in a general, more abstract way, you might think you could get off as still being considered 'truly hardcore' - with having 'these issues' somewhere hidden in your private life, which is not really part of your online and music persona.

but if your 'weakness' exactly is inside 'performing hardcore' - that's a whole different matter. your mental core is really exposed to your fans - truly, deeply exposed.

but i think these are all prejudices. "mental illness" should be just as free of stigma, speculations, stereotypes as physical illness.

no one would mind, or think badly of you, if you perform at a club with one leg in a plaster because you have a broken bone; or any other physical problem.

therefore no one should mind if you perform at hardcore club while 'panicking out of your mind', or having any other mental problem.

Let's grow up and get real, folks. you can be a true, bold hardcore head and still being very fearful or 'clinically sad' at times. because life is complex, the world is complex. and *you are complex*.

it is like it is.

So, for the future I wish that more artists, producers, DJs, technicians, geniuses, and other people that are active in the hardcore scene, would open up and speak about their problems. to get rid of these 'prejudices' inside people's head, and to show others that they are not alone and not the only one in these regards!

For previous editions of the Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter, look here:

https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/p/the-mental-hardcore-health-newsletter.html

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #6 - Being Hardcore with Mental Health Problems

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #6

Being Hardcore with Mental Health Problems

Living your life with mental health problems is never easy. Opening up and talking to others about these - instead of trying to hide them away - is very hard for most people, too.

But there are some aspects that makes this even harder for Hardcore Heads with mental health issues.

Which is that Hardcore, the music, the people, the culture, pushes this image of being tough, rough, aggressive, bold, of dominance and power, of being a strong guy, a reckless maniac, with "balls of steel", death defiant and tenacious from head to toe.

Yet, if you are having problems like anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder...

Well, let me put it this way: you don't feel very "Hardcore" if you run out of a supermarket in sweat & tears because you are having a panic attack.

Or if you can't move your feet out of bed because you're heavily depressed.

Or can't even return a phone call because of your social anxiety.

These things... make you feel more like being a wimp. a coward. frightened & soft. a weakling. not a person with balls, or ovaries, "of steel". not like like a hardcore avenger.

Now, this is problematic. Because how are you gonna deal with it?

It makes a lot of people attempt to hide away their problems. Projecting an image of being a tough gabber maniac to the outside world. while occasionally crumbling on the inside.

And all this makes it even harder for people who have mental health problems - especially when they are having very severe problems - to open up to others in the "scene", and talk freely about these things.

And this can lead to a situation when whole groups project the image of being a hard guy/girl/person to themselves and others, when actually a large percentage of them have these problems themselves.

How could we improve this situation?

First, the image of being a "macho terror killer" or some super tough gabber head without emotions and any weakness (except hate and anger) - you know what i mean - should be questioned. 

in many cases this "being tough as nails", hardcore poser shit is a facade anyway, run by some big labels and small dorks; it's a marketing thing, similar to the "evil" metal bands or "violent" rap artists - and in these cases there is nothing behind it, it just appeals to the fools, ignore it.

why shouldn't you be a weak-ass nerd type with glasses and acne and a belly, that listens to gabber? for example.

that's the first... but it goes deeper than that. After all, there is a *rough* aesthetic and sentiment to hardcore - not just on a "poser" level. it's music with a quality of brutality, rebellion, defiance, roughness, domination, willpower... one can't deny that.

So.

let's just face the fact that life, humans, the world - are complicated. complex. varied. multiple, parallel and layered.

you can be tough, brutal, a rebel, a fear inducing techno ruffian - and still have a "wimpy", fearful side, that comes through in panic & melancholy.

your personality, psyche, and mind, is a cluster of content (or a labyrinth). fears, strengths, weaknesses, powers...

who cares, in the end!

having mental health issues does not make you any less "hardcore", or strong willed, or wall-breaking than others.

you can still be a fire walker. you can still be the storm.

so, my final advice:

try to accept all parts of your personality. your strengths and your weaknesses. your gabber soul, and that social fear, or whatever other "disorders" you might have.

and you have all the rights to show this to the outside world and tell others about this, and you will see, this will make you feel better.

and in the case that someone reacts like they can't handle your openness and honesty about your issues; then maybe *these* people are actually the true "weaklings"!

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #5

Low Entropy has posted a NYE Message, and we felt it is very fitting to the Mental Hardcore Health newsletter and the topics and issues we generally address here, so we decided to repost it!

NYE Message - change the world, change your lives!

So here's my little message for you, to reign in the new year.
I know a lot of you out there go through a lot of pain right now. I know this, because you have told me - in mails, on messengers, and elsewhere.
Not just having a crisis, but that you are essentially getting emotionally choked to death right now. Into the deepest pain and the deepest void imaginable.

Let me tell you, this goes beyond the personal, individual level. The whole world is in a lot of pain right now. It feels like everything is going insane.

Now let me offer you at least a fragment of explanation for these feelings.
The world is changing. On a deep level. And life is, too.
But, people are still fighting this change. And this creates this feeling of pain.
Because people are desperately clinging to things that they are not able to hold on to. And wasting their energy and emotions beyond the point of exhaustion.
Let's give some examples.

People feel depressed and anxious at their workplace. And, indeed, the whole concept of work, attitude related to work etc. is changing right now.
Yet they still walk to their same shitty job every shitty day even though they know it's pointless, their job might disappear in a few years anyway, together with their saving money.
But they still wake themselves up each morning and get out of and bed and walk to a job that's killing them on the inside. For no reason at all.

Or they are stuck in a venomous relationship. They tear each other up, or get torn up. They know nothing changes, and it won't get better. But they still desperately stick to their relationship even though they know it will kill them.

Or they're in a subculture that was lively and exciting in the past, but is populated by numbed zombies and fuckheads now. Still, they don't leave, and change nothing.

Why do people do this? They are afraid of change. They are afraid of something new.
"Better the devil you know", "A new situation could be even worse", and more bullshit sayings like that.
But most importantly, people generally are unable to let go of things. Because, yes, it's true - it's very difficult to let go. It's very hard to start something new. To face a completely new situation.
And finally: Yes, you all are right! What you say is true. When you change something, when you change your life, it could indeed be worse than before. You could fail! You can fail horribly.

But that is not a reason to not at least *try* to change something.

You never have a guarantee for a good outcome in life.
But you should still dive head-first into the unknown.

If you hate your job. Quit it, and try something else.
If you hate your relationship. Quit it, and try something else.
If you hate your subculture. Don't accept it, change it.

That's the only way you will be able to free yourself from the choke-hold.
And this goes for every other area of life as well.

Because, believe me. Things won't get better and easier.

Remember how hard life already was in 2019?
The pain we went through in 2023 made 2019 pale in comparison, right?
Who can fathom how hard 2024 will be for us... and the years that follow - if we don't fight all of this!

So don't stick to things that torture you. Don't follow your routine every day, every month, every year, when you despite that routine.
Get out of situations that are harmful to, to your soul, to your mind.
Flee, fight, or change this stuff.

Yes, change is scary. Yes, the "unknown" feels frightening and the "pain that you are used to" feeds on your illusion of conformity.
And yes, you might even fuck up - at first.
But then get up again, wipe the sweat and blood away, and on to the next round.

I know you can win. I know *we* can win. It's easier than you think.
And when all this is past, you will realize it was much more difficult, and much more painful, to hold on - instead of letting go and moving ahead.

You are a brave, fierce little fighter. Like everyone is, deep in his heart.

I'm counting on you. I'm counting on all of us.


And now here is little additional advice.
If you really feel too frightened - or too uncertain - to tackle these big changes.
Then start by changing little things first.
Do *some* things that are a total breakaway from your routine, while still maintaining it.
Start looking online for new jobs, while sticking to your old job for a while.
Talk to others about your relationship problems even if you feel unable to get out of it at first.
Maybe this illusion of a safety net will help you, while these "small" things will show you that change is indeed possible and waiting for you out there.
Apply this to any other area of life that damages you.

Oh, and please don't get the impression that this text is about some self-help, feel-good kind of stuff.
I'm talking about deep, profound, burning, annihilating changes, that transform your life from the ground up - and the world!

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #4 - Let's normalize talking about mental health issues.

Mental health issues, and conversations about them, are often still a taboo in the hardcore scene.

This is shown by the fact that talking about mental health issues is treated vastly different to talking about physical health issues.

Example 1:

If a DJ says he broke his leg a few weeks ago, it's in plaster now, and he can't attend a party he was booked for, this is seen as perfectly normal.

But when a DJ makes a post saying that he can't perform a gig because he has heavy problems with anxiety or depression, this is much more "problematic".

Yes, talking about extreme physical health issues is not easy either. But it's much worse regarding mental health issues.

Example 2:

Imagine someone would make a post, stating he was diagnosed with stomach cancer, nearly died, had surgery, there were complications, but now he's started to recover.

This is of course very "heavy" stuff, but most people would not object to an artist making such a post, and send their well-wishes, etc.

Now imagine someone would post he was diagnosed with psychosis, tried to end his life, was institutionalized, is now on heavy medication and slowly recovering.

This would upset a lot of people, and create a very different reaction.

And in this case, even many people who normally say they are tolerant and sympathetic to those with mental health issues might send a message along the lines of: "Woah, calm down a bit. You are over-sharing. Don't expose yourself to that degree. Maybe you could write all this in more 'neutral' terms. Like saying you had a time when you felt not so well mentally. No need tell more about it, you know?"

So why are physical and mental health issues treated so differently?

Some would say because the second example above is something that ain't easy to stomach - since these are extreme problems, and reading about them might be hard to handle for some readers.

But the cancer post example is a very heavy issue too, and most people would not consider this topic to be such a taboo.

The truth is: when you are physically all, people think that - you are physically ill. And that's it. It's a horrible situation, and they wish you the best to get well soon.

But with mental illness, you are not just someone who is afflicted by a mental illness - you are "crazy in your head", You are no longer seen as rational, capable of sanity and logic, and so on. There is still a huge stigma to it.

But in reality, a mental illness is just an illness like any other illness. Having anxiety, depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, and so on, no how matter how bad and severe, is not something that should be more of a taboo than having a physical disease.

Having mental health issues can be a huge problem, but it does not define your total personality, just like being in a wheelchair or having a heart disease does not define the whole of you.

If you are "mentally ill", you are just as worthy, and just as capable of enjoying and producing art, music, media, like everyone else.

So let's end the stigma around it.

There has been lots of progress in the past years, this is true, and it's a very good thing.

People talk more openly about it, and there is much less hostility towards people with mental health problems - even in the world of hardcore techno!

These are very good news. But it's not enough yet.

Talking about mental health topics should not be a taboo!

So we should not allow it to stay one.

To read other issues of the Mental Hardcore Health newsletter, check here: https://thehardcoreoverdogs.blogspot.com/search/label/Mental%20Health

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #3

Welcome to the third edition of the Mental Hardcore Health newsletter.

In this issue, Low Entropy talks about his mental health project, and mentions some of his own experiences as well.

Let's begin.

I discovered Hardcore Techno as a teenager with extreme mental health issues. Listening to this music helped me extremely with these problems. 

I eventually started producing Hardcore myself. And the thought quickly came to me that my own productions could help me with my own problems as well. And they did. Tremendously.

To the point that I would probably be homeless, institutionalized, whatever, maybe worse - without being a Hardcore Techno producer.

Now, over the years, through my involvement in the Hardcore scene, I met lots of people, both in the "real world" and online, who also had severe mental health issues, sometimes better, sometimes worse than me.

And now and then, they told me that listening to the tracks I made for my *own* problems, helped them with *their* problems, too! And that "my" music actually helped them tremendously, and changed their lives to the better.

And I don't say this because 'it feeds my ego'. But because, being told this, I came to the thought that I could try to produce tracks in such a way, that it has a potential effect which aids others who are inflicted with these types of problem. To at least *try* to create something that is at least *partially* a cure. (If you don't think that art and music and hardcore *could* have a "therapeutic" effect... well, then I probably can't convince you of this. But I know that art has this power). And this way, I could do something *good* in this world for a change, and not return to the ashes at the end of my life, having wasted my energies.

This then become one of my biggest motifs when producing Hardcore. I wanted to created art that helps others with their mental health issues.

I always assumed this method is not without dangers. "Unleashing" an experimental art therapy... there are lots of things that could go wrong this way. It's one of the main reasons I tried to keep my music "underground", staying away from major labels and major exposure (and often actively sabotaging their efforts to "pull me out of the shadows" and into the public view).

To soothe my conscience, I always hoped that the music itself acts as the "gatekeeper" and lets the right ones in; i.e. that those who have these issues, yet are still drawn to my music, are drawn to it for the very reason that they feel it helps their condition, and does not worsen it!

(Nowadays, my take is that, yeah, what you do does have consequences. There is no 100% safe way in everything. You just gotta have faith, right? And try to do the best you can do.)

By the way, over time, my music attracted quite some wonderful and extreme "lunatics"... but that's another story!

So, here is a selection of tracks I made with the intention to help people with their mental health problems. (The list will be amended over time, so you can came back later to this post, and check it.)

in the list the specific issue to be cured is mentioned (such as depression, anxiety), next to the name of the track (put out on various releases).

So, handle this with care. I can't guarantee there is a help, aid, or cure in *for you*, maybe it will make your condition worse, or things will start to get strange for you quickly.

Let me tell you: I don't assume this would happen, not at all! But I thought a word of warning might be good.

To come to the conclusion of this text.

I hope I can help some people with these tracks on it in some way.

And regardless of this, I wish you the best, and hope you find some good possibilities to deal with your condition(s).

Oh, and if you think that these tracks, or even other music I produced, actually *did* help you, please contact me. Not only would i love this feedback, but it could also make it easier for me to produce similar tracks in the future. and if you had adverse effects, or bother bizarre things happened, you can contact me too, of course.

Check the list here: https://lowentropyproducer.blogspot.com/2023/09/experimental-therapeutic-hardcore.html

Thus ends the third Mental Hardcore Health newsletter.

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #2

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #2

Today's topic: "There is no sex in Hardcore, or: Hardcore on the streets, zero action in the sheets"

Part 1

It's time to tackle one of the biggest taboos in the "Hardcore scene".

Which is: there is no sex in Hardcore. Or rather: there is very little sex in Hardcore. Or rather:

Many, many people in the Hardcore scene only rarely have sex, or no sex at all.

There might be various reasons for this:

1. Many people in the "scene" live socially isolated lives, alone, or "in their parents' basement", or in a similar situation, with few or zero friends, don't go out, don't go to parties, so it's hard to meet someone.

2. Many people in the scene have heavy mental health problems such as agoraphobia or social phobias, which makes it difficult, too, or they might even have mental health issues that makes it 100% impossible for them to be in a relationship, or to have sex.

3. When you listen to extreme Hardcore Techno, "normal society" usually assumes you're a evil twisted psychopath, sick and deranged. Which does not really "attract" people. If you live in a big urban modern metropolis, maybe you can get by, but if you are outside "western civilization" or in a rural area, being a hardcore head might make you a social outcast (and loner) forever.

4. Asexuality. I don't really like these terms, but obviously a lot of people in the scene are on the so-called asexual spectrum.

Asexuality is a bit more complicated than other "identities". For example, there are asexuals who are crazy for pornography and *fantasize* about 'sexual intercourse' but would never be interested to do 'the act' in reality.

These terms and "sex theories" aside, there are simply lots of people in the scene that are just "not that interested" in sex.

5. Which brings us to this part. Some people just have different or higher priorities than sex.

They might be interested in sex, and would do it, but it's just not very high on their priority list.

Just as some inventors or business-people in the past refrained from having sex in order to be able to fully focus on their tasks and goals, people might want to focus on hardcore and music first - instead of romancing, dating etc.

6. Hardcore appears to incorporate some anti-sex elements. I know some people that are into a promiscuous, fetish, kink lifestyle, with "lots of sex", who told me they rarely had "encounters" or "opportunities" within the hardcore scene or with hardcore people.

It seems that hardcore itself is blocking out sex.

7. And this leads to the final point. Hardcore music itself can be a kind of orgasmic experience that releases sexual energy. And that can be enough for some people.

At least that's been hinted at by a few individuals.

There are of course many more possible explanations, or a combination of these. I just wanted to list some of them.

Part 2

Now let's get more into the "mental health aspect".

Society is kind of torn right now, between some people who are very sex crazy on the one hand (no problem with that) and "incels" and other type of people who "lack" sex, are full of hate, blame women, "minorities", and so on (lots of problems with that!).

This often generates very heated debates (pun intended) and blots out a meaningful discourse.

So let's sober up a bit and talk more sensible about it.

Part 3

And here is the good message (and the message is clear).

It's okay if you don't have a lot of sex. It's okay if you're asexual. It's okay if you are not very much interested in having sex. It's also okay if you would like to have sex but are prevented from it for whatever reason (for example by mental health issues).

You are not a loser because of this, and should not feel like one.

"Sex is nice" but it doesn't define a complete person.

You are just like you are, and this is okay, and you should live like you want to, regardless of what other people think.

All these things mentioned here are still very big societal taboos, and it's time people talk about it more openly.

---End of newsletter

Archive:

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #1

Mental Hardcore Health Newsletter #1

Hello friends and strangers,

With the first issue of this newsletter we want to address a topic that is still somewhat taboo; in society and culture at large, but also especially in the Hardcore scene.

We're talking about mental health issues, "mental illnesses", "disorders", that kind of thing.

Problems that relate to the mind, soul, psyche, subconsciousness.

While mental illness generally affects many people in our culture, the same is true for the hardcore scene, too.

This newsletter is aimed at people who are troubled by these maladies

Now let's get straight to the points:

#1. You are not alone

As mentioned above. There are many people in the HC scene who have mental problems and have to deal with these matters. The scene is full of people with problems like you. Sometimes it even seems as if the sounds attract people who are troubled by "mental disorders" (this "attraction" must not be a bad thing; see below). So, be sure. you are not the only one who has these problems.

#2. A lot of people have heavy problems

You might think: "Yeah, talking about mental health issues is less taboo these days. a lot of people talk about anxiety or depression or something like that. but most of them function reasonably well. Maybe they have panic attacks and feel down. but they pop a pill and are still able to go to work and live their lives. But for me it's different. I got 'mentally ill' as a teen, and it only got worse, I've been in and out of 'lunatic asylums', everytime I try go get a job and to live on my own it works for a while, then I get a full breakdown and relapse, I can't function at all, it's some very heavy stuff".

or "I can't escape my depression, I can't do anything at all, I live socially isolated, can't even leave the house anymore".

And similar examples.

But as we said before: You are not alone! There are many people like you in the scene. many of us have heavy, heavy problems.

For example: Why do you think the online scene is so much more lively and active than the hardcore actions that happen in real life?

A huge reason for this is that in order to do online stuff, you don't need to leave the house, don't need to meet people in real life; thus the producers / DJs / promoters etc. who can't do these things in real life channel all their energy into their online activities!

On the internet, you don't know how people "truly" are. A DJ or producer name is a persona, and a DJ and producer might come off as fierce, hard, bold, famous, confident, when in real life he has schizophrenia, is psychotic, manic-depressive, or similar things.

Don't judge books by their "covers"

Believe us, there are a lot of people with very serious and terrible conditions in the hardcore scene. You shouldn't feel like an outsider because of this.

#3. There is no need to be ashamed

There is still a stigma attached to mental disorders, which makes them so taboo, and prevents a lot of people to talk openly about their problems or about this topic in general.

But there should be no shame.

There is little shame to physical diseases, right? People don't get shamed or stigmatized because they have heart diseases or chronic illnesses or liver conditions or stuff like that (or at least to a much lesser degree).

If it's okay to talk about your physical diseases, it should be just as okay to talk about mental diseases.

You are not wrong or bad or broken or need to be despised, just because you happen to have a mental disorder.

#4. Music (and especially hardcore) is the cure

Here is a good message we want to get across, maybe one of hope. We mentioned that people with "disorders" are seemingly attracted to hardcore techno and its subgenres. and, we've heard of many people who said that hardcore music had a kind of "healing" effect on them. That it soothed their moods when they were depressed or anxious. or, even stronger, that it "saved their lives"; and that a track, event, party, whatever, reached them when they were "in the deepest pit" and ended up pulling them out of it.

Just as art and creativity in general can have a proven positive effect on mental illness, we think that hardcore techno has an especially strong and positive effect in that vein - and even more.

So, "stay down with the hardcore". It might do you good (and save your soul).

#5. It's good to talk about it

Mental health problems should not be a taboo. Yes, it's hard to talk about it, we know, but try to muster the strength and reach out to your friends and others, and talk about it. This can make you feel better. By a lot.

Of course you might get "asshole reactions" by some of them, but, yeah, try to stay away from these people then.

Regardless, mental health topics should be addressed more openly.

#6. Reach out for help

It's not a sign of weakness if you realize that you could need some help by others regarding your problems.

We don't have a list with resources here, but if you think you need help, try to contact to a friend or find some help resources online.

And we hope you get the help you need.

#7. You rule!

To end this newsletter. Let us tell you that you rule! Because everyone deserves to live fully and happily, regardless of problems with health or other concerns.

If you have been struggling with mental health issues you probably needed to win some very tough battles in your life, and this shows you got strength, perseverance and persistence.

Also, people with these so-called "disorders" provided a lot of creative efforts and powerful ideas, activity and achievements to the hardcore scene (after all, which producer does not have some kind of "disorder"?).

There are more reasons, but let us tell you: you are a great person!

So, we are happy that you are here, and are with us, in this scene of hardcore techno, with all its energies, dreams, hopes, and possibilities of fulfillment.

This concludes the mental hardcore health newsletter.

We hope this message could help you in some kind of way, and that together we can break down the "taboo" of "mental illness" a bit.

Stay bold and stay strong!